Choosing your attendants

This task may be simple for some and a nightmare for others!  The groom should choose a best man and his groomsmen while the bride should choose her bridesmaids which can include a ‘Matron of Honour’ if desired.
Flowergirls, ring bearers and ushers will also need to be chosen if suited to your wedding.
My advice? Please think carefully about your choices, if you have a life long best mate, you should choose them, no matter what.  However, if you have a group of friends of equal importance in your life you may be able to choose one best suited to the role.  We are not talking about looks here but choosing the people that will enhance your special day by being there, for you, from start to finish.  Do not be pressured into choosing long lost cousins or nieces.   Do not choose anyone that has the potential to cause trouble!  I have seen many a wedding almost ruined by terrible, inappropriate best man speeches or a prima donna bridesmaid who has sulked throughout the day.  Choosing a fantastic friend who will support you and not embarrass you is the key.  However, this also applies to the bride and the groom.  Please be honest and upfront with your attendants right from the word go.  They will need to know all that is involved with their role and the costs involved.  Be empathetic to your friend’s life circumstances; do not assume that your plans will be feasible for them.
As far as costs go, the bride and groom traditionally pay for any of the attendant’s outfits – hireage or purchase, while the attendants usually cover the cost of their shoes.  Their hair, makeup and accessories also have to be factored into your budget so that may limit the number of attendants you may be able to have.
However, an increasingly popular choice when wanting to have many groomsmen and bridesmaids is to have a colour theme which enables the attendants to wear (and purchase) a coordinating dress/suit of their own choosing.  Although a less structured look, it should still be obvious who is a member of the wedding party, especially if a matching wrap, tie or bouquet unifies the group also.
It is customary for the attendant to be given a small gift in appreciation for their help. Of course this gift can be anything but it is common for it to be the jewellery or cufflinks worn on that day.
Just remember that these attendant will be in charge of your bridal shower, hen’s night and stag do so it would pay not to upset them unduly……